I once read Paradise Lost, the Odyssey and War & Peace all in one day and still had time to refurbish an entire dining room that evening. When I go to Wendy's, the entire menu changes to 99 cents. I bake 30 minute brownies in 20 minutes flat. I hate fantasies because they always come true. I once climbed Mount Everest, Mount Kilamanjaro, and K-2 using only one bottle of oxygen and a sack of trail mix. I always pick the fullest and most symmetrical Christmas trees. Every day is my lucky day. I consistently beat Chuck Norris in arm wrestling matches. I don't pay attention to fashion because it is always a step behind. I have made extraordinary four course meals using only a spatula and a toaster oven. When you meet me, the pleasure will be all yours.